i am 21 now!!! now if i for some reason want to go to america i can drink. i tried recreationally drinking the other weekend, when i did it on friday night it was fine but i miscounted the number of shots i took when i tried it again the next night (i had no weed so i had to make do) i took way too many. luckily because i am pure of heart i didn't get too badly hungover but i was nauseous all of the next day which sucked & thinking about taking those shots makes me gag but! i have weed again now. thank you franky 🫶

so far i have heard back from 1 of the dispensaries i applied to & it was a rejection (expected, they wanted more experience than i had but i shot my shot anyways) so i signed the contract my old summer job offered me 😓 i am being shipped off to town name come end of april... tragic. but at least i will have a room upstairs this time instead of in the basement... i need to be able to see the sun in the morning or else i get severely depressed.

speaking of that i think i have ocd because i have been having SYMPTOMS lately. mostly intrusive thoughts. i won't put what a lot of my intrusive thoughts resolve around but it mostly is 3 main themes & causes me a lot of anxiety especially recently. i have found myself ruminating a lot & it is super annoying to constantly have to break myself out of the thought spiral & find something else to occupy my attention... i don't really have many compulsions i don't think, mostly counting stairs because if i don't i'll fall down & get hurt (i have a fear of bodily injury) (if i know the number of stairs & get a different number i have to start over), if i am listening to music with a beat i can walk to i have to stay on beat or otherwise my skin starts crawling & i get super uncomfortable, etc. ocd is often comorbid with tourettes which i do have (i have had tics since i was a kid) & i have questioned whether i have it a couple times over the years but i always feel like a faker if i say that i have it so i have never been like yeah i have ocd. i kind of have been wanting to talk to someone about it & my anxiety in general because i kind of have been feeling like it is genuinely affecting my life in a negative way but i never remember to actually make an appointment or ask about it (conveniently forgetting...). well i will get to it eventually.

this comimg week i have 2 presentations to do its so horrible... 1 of them is tomorrow and 1 is on thursday. the tomorrow one i have finished my part of, it is a group assignment for my translation class & it is also the final so once we finish our essay i am done with that class for ever. the other one is my compling final project, i am supposed to make a poster to present. i have barely started on this one but i have a bunch of sources that i just need to look through & take notes on so i can make up my poster. then there is a paper for that one as well i think it will be about 4 pages long, i am going to include figures i think so hopefully that will take up lots of space aswell. & i have one more assignment for pragmatics due on friday & then i am DONE my classes & have 3 exams to do in middle/end of april before going back to town name. i am disappointed i won't be staying here for the summer but i will survive my 2 other coworkers i love are coming back also so it will be fine we will get to hangout every day.

i have been productive today! shocker because it's the weekend & i am usually the least productive on the weekend... but i did all of my part for our slideshow for tomorrow & wrote a post for my gender blog (thinking of putting it on my main blog... not sure....) & played minecraft & now am writing this. i know what i said in my blog post might be a hot take but i stand by it!!! i was inspired to write it while playing minecraft watching old ashton daniels videos in the background. it got me thinking & then i remembered that study which found that lots of trans men who underwent vaginectomy (removal of the vaginal canal) had grown prostate-like tissue that in some cases was "extremely developed" & then i was thinking of how i wanted to do a transgender vs transsexual post & i was like heyyyy wait a minute this is kind of tea... & then i wrote it out. yeah i'm a philosopher or whatever...

i don't have anything else to say soooo bye ^_^
i am grateful for:
1. whoever cancelled on my endocrinologist on the same day that i called
2. my clothes i can make cute outfits with
3. my friends who sent me birthday wishes
4. the steak i found in my freezer (it was delicious)
5. being assigned to the second day of compling poster presentations

things that made me happy:
1. buying new pants that fit really well
2. going on an adventure with my friend
3. spending time with my kitten
4. cooking something yummy
5. starting a new minecraft world

a beautiful combination of slight agoraphobia + medical anxiety + gender dysphoria + poor time management + memory issues have prevented me from filling my prescriptions for testosterone & leupron so i have been rationing my (surprisingly large) backup supply of t gel while being off leupron. i have been meaning to get them both filled but it's really annoying constantly transferring them between pharmacies depending on where i am (school, hometown) so i told myself i would keep it one place and go there myself whenever i need it filled again... well this did not work because leupron usually needs to be ordered several weeks in advance in my hometown's pharmacy and i am bad at planning. so i never ended up doing this, ny last leupron injection was in august & it is now the end of march. i try to keep an extra box or two of t gel just in case & i am often bad at remembering to put it on so i skip doses, but i am running out >_< i have about 2 weeks' worth left. awesome.

when i finally tried to transfer everything to my campus pharmacy they told me they needed to fax my dr to have the prescriptions reissued because they had lapsed -_-; & then from there it took like a week & a half because they faxed my gp first who then directed them to my endo who told them she needed to speak with me first. the horror!!!!!! usually she books 1-2 months out so i was very scared at this & did a ton of research into diy hrt because i am NOT going off testosterone. but then i called today (so scared) & miraculously she had a cancellation for this afternoon so i was able to speak with her & get my prescriptions reissued. well, i got my t script reissued. we talked about it and decided i would stay off leupron since t is doing what leupron was doing for me originally, plus leupron is a gigantic needle (seriously insanely large, usually when i would get it done as a teen the nurse would put it into a smaller needle because otherwise she would hit bone) & it is SO FUCKING EXPENSIVE like seriously it's like $1200 THATS CRAZY WORK luckily its covered by insurance but still.

so i am going off leupron for good which means i need to be better at doing my t gel. once the pharmacy calls to say i can pick it up i am going to keep a box by my bed because i spend so much time there that it probably will be easier to put it on there than get up to do it in the bathroom. i am so so relieved that i was able to get it sorted so quickly i was so anxious about this... but now almost all of my major issues (job + money + hrt + etc) are solved. yay ❤️

i am the luckiest man alive

hii ^_^ all this week it has been so nice! it rained on sunday but it was still warm. frankie & i made our japanese curry & it was so good! & i love my rice cooker it is perfect & beautiful & amazing. we watched the fnaf movie while eating it was awesome.

frankie brought me this fancy vintage coat they bought at a thrift store a while back but didn't end up liking. so it's MINE now and i love it! it makes me feel so fancy & dramatic, i have been wearing it every day this week. it was a little warm for it today i think but it was fine.

i called my old summer job again on monday to ask for an update as it has been over a week but no one answered so i left a voicemail but still i have had no reply... probably i will call again tomorrow or friday. i hate to be pushy but it is getting to the end of march & i would like to have a plan for the summer before exams so i can stop being stressed about it. today i went on an impromptu application spree. i had planned to go to 3 more dispensaries before class to drop off a resume, but then i started getting anxious about it so during class i went & sent out a bunch of online applications & cold emails, & after my classes ended i went out and & dropped off resumes at 5 more dispensaries. it was a grand total of 17 resumes, applications, or emails. hopefully people will start getting back to me soon, a bunch of the places that weren't currently hiring but took my resume said they would start hiring for the summer soon so i have my fingers crossed.

i have been feeling overall really good this week! i have been walking around outside a lot & i think it has been helping. on tuesday i didn't go to class because i couldn't get the momentum to get myself presentable but i was still productive & did some job applications & schoolwork, but monday & today i went to my classes & walked around afterwards! & i have been making proper dinner too. i have noticed the past couple years i get really depressed & unmotivated around the wintertime but start to feel better in the spring... unfortunately not many classes are offered in the spring/summer term so it's not really feasible for me to switch. but i have my happy light now so maybe next winter it will help? i have been having some crazy intrusive thoughts recently as well which sucks & has left me feeling anxious, and combined with my anxiety about not having enough money for things & not being able to find a job it has been a little rough. also i think i have another uti which is annoying. but the sun is out and that has really been helping.

i finally made it out to transfer over my prescriptions to the campus pharmacy. i am hoping to have them filled soon but unfortunately since it's been a while since i had them filled (i have been neglecting myself medically over the winter) they needed to reach out to my doctor & have them reissued. very annoying but hopefully resolved soon. i also need to call a doctor back about something which makes me feel very uncomfortable & i feel like i have no one to talk to about it. & i don't really want to talk about it in detail here either so i am kind of stuck feeling sick over it. my coping method for stuff is mainly just push it to the back of my mind which has been easier with the not being as depressed lately. & i have been keeping busy with job applications so i am doing ok about it.

lately i have been really enjoying my compling class. even though it's hard & i don't really understand everything, it is an interesting & fun challenge. i like drawing FSAs and making up simple grammars. we learned about string theory at the very beginning of term & it has recently become relevant in semantics which is nice. i have been doing well on the past couple of assignments for all my classes which has made me feel very happy. except for philosophy of language i um. failed the midterm.... well i will do a lot of studying for the final & hopefully pass, the professor is letting us do presentations for extra credit but i don't know what i would present about... friday is the last day to drop a class so i need to decide ASAP if it's worth it to take another full-time term before graduating. sigh. it probably isn't honestly, if i do my very best for the final i might be able to pass. i think as long as i get 65% on the final i will pass the class. i should get a good grade in translation & also in pragmatics which will help pad my gpa & i think i will do decent in compling & ok in semantics so if i do my very best in these last couple weeks i think i will be ok.

i am working on my gender page! this iteration of it is going to be somewhat of a blog because i have a lot of thoughts about gender & being transgender & such which i wanted to have separate from my journal of main blog (which i am still working on also!) which is why it's taking a little longer. but it hopefully will be done by the weekend! & now for my gratefullness stuffs...
i am thankful for:
1. not having to wear base layers
2. so many dispensaries in this city
3. my legs being able to carry me places
4. my friends for being kind to me
5. my nice clothes that make me look professional

things that made me happy:
1. rain!
2. wearing my new coat
3. taking long walks
4. people taking my resume
5. friendly people in my group project group

ok that is all for now i love you bye!

helloooo ^_^ it is 3am on saturday and i have been having a week. i did not make it to classes from tuesday-friday BUT i had an excuse for most of it. on wednesday i ran out of clean underwear which is somewhat necessary so i spent the day doing laundry, thursday-friday i went out job hunting! i printed out a bunch of resumes and handed them out to 10 dispensaries, 5 of which were currently hiring & i even got to speak with the manager/owner of 2! tuesday i ahve no excuse.

i had 3 assignments this week, 1 was for semantics which i think i did well on, 1 was for pragmatics which i think i did ok on, and 1 was a research proposal for compling so i have no idea how i did on it but i hope it's okay. i am going to try to actually put in effort for this project because since i skip so many classes i feel guilty so i figure might as well show that when i do go to class i pay attention. i always feel so lazy when i don't go to classes because i usually don't have an excuse but usually i am so exhausted that the thought of getting out of bed makes me want to cry & sometimes i just genuinely can't convince myself to get up. so.

on sunday frankie is coming over & we are going to make japanese curry! i love japanese curry sm because the texture is amaaaaaazing & franky is also going to bring me old containers they & their roommates are getting rid of which is exciting! i will get to use my new rice cooker i haven't opened yet, it was a birthday present from my parents. it's not the brand of rice cooker i would have bought myself (i was saving up sort of for one from zojirushi) but i still like it. it has lots of buttons on it for making stuff other than just regular rice so hopefully it will help me to actually cook foods other than pierogies.

i have sm cleaning to do later today... i have to put away all my clean laundry that has been sitting in the hamper since wednesday, wash all of my dishes, clean the bathrom, sweep, mop... sigh. probably i will watch a show while i do it. this week i have started rewatching little house on the prairie since i stole the dvds from my mom a while ago. i did NOT clock how insanely christian this show is as a kid... it is also kind of really uncomfortable it is at times especially talking about indigenous people. i know it is supposed to be like the common attitude at the time but like. do we have to. sigh again. well it is in dvd not streaming so no one profits plus i have skip button. anyways.

i have been somewhat lazy the past couple weeks but it is nice weather now which means i am somewhat less depressed. i can open my windows now also which is AMAZING because i love opening the windows i love to feel the breeze...

i am going to be soooo tired later. on thursday while handing out resumes i walked approximately 10 kilometers & then on friday i walked 5. i only needed 1 blister bandaid though ^_^ it was so warm on friday i almost had to take my cardigan off it was so warm. but it was nice to be in the sunshine & hopefully i will get at least 1 call for a job!

that is mostly it for this week. i got new pants! they are from depop & they are soooo comfy.
i am grateful for:
1. warm weather
2. second cup mocha frappe
3. not having to wear a jacket
4. my mom sending me $20
5. having a printer

things that made me happy:
1. drawing FSAs in class
2. wearing regular shoes instead of winter boots
3. taking a long walk & exploring parts of the city i have never been to before
4. my new pants arriving early
5. people taking my resume

i love you goodbye!!

currently i am sitting on campus waiting to go to my translation class. it is such a nice day i decided to come early so i could walk to my compling class instead of taking the train (since it is on the other side of campus sometimes taking the train is nicer than trekking 20 minutes in the cold) & i enjoyed walking outside in the sunshine.

i was supposed to write this yesterday but i ended up being busy so i am writing it today. but it's fine.

my mom was pestering me about calling my summer job from last year to see if they would want me back, i emailed my old boss on wednesday night but she hadn't responded by the next day so my mom was like idea! call her now. & i was like well no i'll be polite & give her 2 business days to respond she's probably busy. & my mom was like well fine but if you don't you will die alone homeless on the streets. & i was like wow ok well i will call her tomorrow i guess. jesus. so i called her the next day & what do you know! she didn't have an answer for me. she needed to talk to another person who had been on vacation about hiring & such but she said she would email me next week. so really it would have been better to call on monday (today) anyways. so i was a little annoyed by that partially because i felt like it was rude & partially because making personal phone calls (ie. not for work or to my friends) makes me feel like i am going to throw up & pass out. i made the call sitting in bed clinging to my blahaj for dear life it was truly horrible.

my friend frankie and i hung out on sunday and did karaoke which was so fun ^_^ we sang songs such as heathens 21pilots, radioactive imagine dragons, & one day aria my little pony. it wa very fun. i love to sing & do it alot by myself. one of my favourite songs to sing is just a man from epic the musical even though i don't actually like epic the musical it is just a fun song to sing.

i actually don't have much to talk about for last week so i will put my gratefullness stuff & that will be all.
i am thankful for:
1. music to make me happy when i feel sad
2. the man across the street who loudly shovels his driveway at 3am, i feel a strange sort of kinship with him
3. my friends who listen to me & make me feel a connection to the world
4. warmer weather
5. my education, even when it gets hard

things that made me happy:
1. singing loudly in my apartment
2. opening the window at midnight to smell the air & listen to the city
3. peeling oranges in bed
4. petting my kitty
5. jumping over melted snow puddles
ok that is everything i love you & goodbye!

i got my cannsell certification ^_^ & it was my kitty's birthday yesterday!! he is 2 years old now they grow up so fast... hard to believe it's been over a year and a half with him now it barely feels like a month... i am so grateful to have him in my life it was a little hard for a while suddenly being completely on my own and taking care of another living being aswell but it's all worked out & i wouldn't trade him for anything <3

i have been trying to be kinder to myself & start doing things other than go to school go to sleep & repeat. it is supposed to start warming up this week so i am going to try to start taking walks & being more positive. to help with this i am going to record 5 things that made me happy each week & will include them in my journal posts for the week (i write my journal posts in my phone's notes app & type them up on the computer later, so i can record stuff on the go). here is one for last week:
i am thankful for:
1. my family who supports me
2. my nice clothes that make me feel good
3.my kitten who is nice to me & loves me & who i love sm
4. mango monster energy drink
5. the ability to express myself through body modification

things that made me happy:
1. getting my eyebrows pierced
2. the first warm spring breeze
3. making finite state acceptors for my compling midterm
4. buying new ice packs for cricket's autofeeder so i can get up later in the morning
5. seeing pea on the neighbour's porch when i got home from class

i just made a new spotify playlist because the old one i was listening to was 14 hours long (my driving playlist) & i was tired of skipping 5 million songs to get to a good one. some of it is sad songs but there are some happy ones too which i think is important if i want to be more positive. lately i have been really into weightless by all time low & also nobody's perfect from hannah montana. i think the latter is unironically a really uplifting & motivating song even if it's meant for kids. i have been struggling with university this year, 2 of my classes from last term i didn't pass & combined with my 1st year logic class which i also didn't pass & the one i dropped in 2nd year that means i have 4 credits to make up before i can graduate so that means i have to either take 2 in the summer & 6 per term next year OR take an extra semester & it has been kind of affecting my self esteem. i have always been able to coast through school with minimal effort or difficulty but i haven't been able to do that this year which has shaken my confidence in myself & made me really anxious & worried about school, but listening to that song helps make me feel a little better & i can tell myself that it's okay & sometimes you just have to try again & you will get it right in the end. & weightless is kind of similarly motivational in that i am tired of sitting here not really doing anything & i want to do something to make it worth it.

i also was able to get bubble tea with my friend ylfva! it was very fun because we haven't seen eachother in 2 & a half months. usually we get coffee at a specific coffee shop he introduced me to & sit down & talk for a while but sadly that place has closed down now so we have had to make alternative arrangements. i made a list of places in the same area that looked interesting & the bubble tea place was our first pick. usually i don't get bubble tea because i don't like the texture of boba (popping pearls are alright though), i generally gravitate to places that do blended drinks like frappes because i like slushies. but i decided to try it & i am glad i did! i got mango juice which was very good & had chunks of whole mango at the bottom which was unexpected & i wasn't sure how i felt about it at first but i decided that it was ok because i love mango. me & ylfvie chatted for a while, he told me about school tea & his boyfriend's brother's strange name & his strange hometown friends, & i told him about my favourite olden days tumblr troll blog who i have been thinking about lately because of being recommended stuff on instagram that reminded me of them. then we talked around the mall for a bit before i had to go to class where i dodn't pay attention and just worked on my cannsell.

i got 100% on the exam btw! so now i am officially certified to work in a dispensary. here's hoping i will finally land a job with it... now i know all about terpenes & responsible selling & that if you sell weed to a minor you can get up to 14 years in prison. so don't do that.

oh wow this is long i should probably go now it is late & i need to be up for class tomorrow. goodnight i love you sparkle on!!

helloooo i have officially finished all my midterms! i think i did decently on both compling & semantics, less so on philosophy of language but i think i passed at least. so yay ^_^ i also went to the majority of my classes this week which is good since i was skipping alot earlier in the term... i have been starting to enjoy compling a little more since i figured out how to do finite state acceptors it is actually kind of fun to make them to be honest.

it was really warm for the first couple days this week which was nice but it turned out to just be false spring because on thursday temps dropped & then friday an&d yesterday it was snowing alot. i'm hoping for a full week of spring weather before my birthday at the end of the month! the transition between late winter and early spring is my favourite, i like it when the snow is melted through in places so you can see patches of grass & the early spring flowers are coming up & there's still a cool breeze from the snow but its like 5° & you can feel the sun on your face. it feels like hope & like new beginnings.

i got my eyebrows pierced on wednesday! a reward for myself for getting through midterms. i have been really into piercings for the past ~2 years or so & since it's been so long since i last got a new piercing (last time was both of my conches in march 2024 for my bday) i decided to do something a little different & got paired angled inner eyebrow piercings. they look so cute & i am so glad i got them. they are slightly bruised still but healing well ^_^ trying to keep my eyebrows still so they have the best chance of healing has been somewhat of a challenge considering i have tics that involve scrunching my eyebrows and raising and wiggling them but for the most part i have been able to suppress and redirect them. it does mean i've been ticcing a little more often however which is annoying but i can deal with it :eye roll: currently i am working on a blog post about body modification because it is something i am interested in & i have a lot of thoughts about it ^_^

DOUG FORD WON THE FUCKING ELECTION I AM PISSED I HATE HIS ASS SO MUCHHHHH and i know in my heart that half the tory voters thought this was a federal election and were trying to vote trudeau out which makes this worse... well ontario is usually reverse bellwether so hopefully this indicates the federal election will go red? pretty please??? ndp would be better but i will accept liberals if i must.

this weekend i am trying to get my cannsell certification so i can apply for a bunch of dispensary jobs... fingers crossed this will pay off!

hiiii ^_^ i voted yesterday! there is a provincial election in ontario right now & i want doug ford fucking fired. since i live away from home for uni i had to vote in advance because i will not be home or able to come home on election day. & it was less crowded yesterday anyways. this is the second time i have voted in a provincial election, i voted in 2022 before going off to uni but unfortunately doug ford won that one... sad. well, here's hoping we get ndp or at least liberals in this time.

i said in my last entry that i was going to be studying for midterms all week this week. well, guess what? i didn't do anything. like absolutely nothing. it's 4am on saturday & since today is my last day here i need to lock in between doing laundry. & i can still study in the car & on monday. i mostly need to go over logic for semantics & review the lecture slides for philosophy of language, but i will need to genuinely lock in after those midterms on tuesday because i refuse to fail my compling midterm & i am so incredibly behind in that class.

in other news i discovered 2 of my old tumblr blogs are still kicking... i had to figure out which long-forgotten email address was attached to which account, & i managed to get the oldest one deleted but i lost the password to the email for the other one & all the passwords i have listed don't work so i had to submit a form to tumblr staff. they have been helpful in the past when my current blog's password expired somehow and i couldn't log in, so i am hoping they can help me get access to this one also. i have a bad habit of forgetting to delete accounts once i abandon them & then losing access to the email i used to create them so they are just stuck forever.

yesterday was a friend's birthday, & i wanted to reach out to say hi & give them my well wishes but i realized that i have no way to contact them?! i knew they deleted their instagram a while back but i've been off tumblr so i didn't notice they deleted their blog too... & the only other contact i have is a discord account which idek is active or not... or animal crossing but i don't have nintendo online rn. i feel bad for not noticing earlier. if you see this ever happy birthday shep i miss u....

anyways um aside from that i found a silverfish in the bathroom yesterday it was like the end portal spawn room lol. i think i am going to go to bed now it is 5am & i need to sleep more so goodnight

woooo first journal entry (party emoji) i have been busy as fuck this week! first, i had a quiz on monday which was followed immediately (as in, during the same class) by a presentation i had to give about translation loss and literal vs connotative meaning, then i had a quiz AND a midterm on Wednesday, & then 2 assignments due on Thursday which i left until the very last minute. & this week is reading week, so i also had to clean my entire apartment from top to bottom & do tons of laundry in preparation. AND we got TONS of snow this past week so i had to go out to shovel a couple times too. it has been a trying week.

my mom came to pick me up for reading week the other day & we had to drive 8 hours back in a snowstorm. during the trip, we saw a grand total of 5 accidents, 2 people in the ditch, & 0 snow plows on our side of the road... the other side had about 15. tch. & we were on the same highway for about 6 hours. come on. the visibility was generally pretty decent but the snow was accumulating sooo fast & it was getting icy in some places. the classic canadian winter game of hope you are in your lane and drive straight. we almost got sideswiped by several people who for some reason thought it was a good idea to drive super close to us... & we passed a couple of people who had zoomed past us at like 120kmh (for reference, we were going about 60, maaaaaaybe 80 if we could see the road, on a 100kmh highway) minutes earlier at the side of the road because they had crashed. be careful driving in the snow it is treacherous as fuck!!!

like i mentioned this week is reading week, & i have a lotttttt to get caught up on. i have not been having the time of my life recently so i've been slacking off and skipping class a lot, and while most of my lectures get posted online not all do (looking at you, computational linguistics (the hardest class of them all)) & i have 3 midterms next week so i need to get my nose to the grindstone this week. i've made a study schedule for this week, i have 4 classes i need to study for: philosophy of language, semantics, pragmatics, and compling. all of my classes are pretty hard this term (not in a course load-intensive way, but the content is harder for me) but luckily they are all pretty interrelated so studying one helps in another. my translation midterm was the one last week, & i think i did okay even though i ran out of time on one of the last questions. that's probably the easiest class i have since all it really is is coming to class, listening to a 5 minute lecture, and translating one sentence from french and writing a discussion post about it. unlike semantics where we are doing formal logic (Ex(Cx ^ Sx), or x exists such that x is a class and x sucks) (i hate logic) or compling where we are drawing pictures (finite state acceptors)... AHHHH i am tired of university & it is making me irritable about everything.

on friday i saw one of the neighbourhood stray cats. my downstairs neighbour feeds them & has winter shelters for them so it is not uncommon to see cat tracks, but i haven't gotten acquainted with any of them other than pea. she is black with white paws and she is such a sweetheart. she meows at me and makes me sit down and pat her and scratch her head and i give her chicken and sheep liver treats. i was glad to see her as i haven't seen much of the neighbourhood cats this winter & i have been worried about them. pea seemed to be in good spirits however & she was still plump so i think she has been ok. i'm not sure if she is truly a stray or just an "outdoor" cat (i have thoughts on outdoor cats... maybe i will write a blog post about it?) who has someone taking care of her (other than my neighbour) but i hope she & the other cats have somewhere warm to sleep at night & lots of food to eat.

ok i have nothing else to talk about really it is 4:45am in the morning so i think i will go to bed goodnightmorning!